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“Over My Shoulder”

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"Over My Shoulder"
by Steve H Kehoe
Random Thoughts while contemplating the future of the Dallas Cowboys...............is Jason Garrett the answer? Hmmmm...
Things we can all do without.....in fact....quite easily:
Child-proof caps (make that "Senior-proof") on all medicine bottles
Furniture ads on TV that feature a grandmother and grand-daughter. Not cute.
Public Television money-raising telethons. Hey, let them get $ from the Govt! GM did!
Whoopie Goldberg & "The View"
Skating with the Stars. It could never top "Dancing with the Stars" No way.
Chelsea Handler, Rush Limbaugh, Conan O'Brien, David Letterman.
Every single ad on TV for cell phones
Chia Pets (although the new bunch is kinda cute (and make good cheap gifts!)
Bret Favre and his NFL Odyssey. Boring!
Never knowing whether to dial a "1" before making a call to Tyler or Longview.
Did you ever stop and think....:
You have more time to spend each day when you realize you aren't gonna accomplish anything of importance that day.
Howcum women cannot apply mascara with their mouths closed?
Stop and realize: "abbreviated" is an oxymoron.
Why is it necessary to nail shut the lid of a coffin?
Why has no one come out with "mouse-flavored" cat food?
Is it OK to use the AM radio after noon?
What do the Chinese call their good dishes?
Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the tube or bottle?
Why do we inevitably turn down the car radio when searching for an address?
Why bother to sterilize needles used for an execution?
Wouldn't you rather the airlines issue you a parachute instead of a life jacket?
No one knows the official origin of the word "Pussycat". Really!
Why do we call a certain food "Chili" when it is really rather hot (and spicy)?
Do Angels believe in humans?
Don't you wish you had back all that time in school practicing handwriting?
If they summon a deaf person to court, can they still call it a "hearing"?
Why are actors IN movies, but ON television?
It'd be so nice if we screw up in life, if we could just hit "alt-control-delete".
It does NOT take a village to raise a child; it DOES take two committed parents!
How is it that we drive on a parkway and park on a driveway?
How do you fold a "fitted" sheet anyway?
How does the state designate hair color on a man's driver's license?
Kay Jewelers has it all wrong: Most kisses begin with a few Bud Lites.
About when you were a kid, and imagining your parents having sex?
If money doesn't grow on trees, howcum there are "Branch Banks"?
No one ever told us raising kids was easy. After all, it began with Labor!
Why is it called "a pair" of pants, and only one "bra"?
Why is it that a psychic never wins the lottery?
Why won't our government let Johnny read the Bible in school? He can in Prison!
Success usually occurs in private, while Failure is there for all to see.
Oh, I see! Posting "Thou shalt not steal" on gov't. bldgs. creates a hostile workplace.
If at first you don't succeed.....perhaps you should consider giving up skydiving.
That more than half of the people on earth have never received a phone call?
Why are you and I accountable for our actions, but celebrities seldom are?
A person who is cruel to waitstaff and animals would not make a good "companion".
Next time you think nobody cares about you, try missing two car payments!
Why not dig a fifty-foot trench ten feet deep along the Mexican border, and then give the excess dirt to Louisiana to build levees? Brother, that's a "win-win"!!

Steve H Kehoe, This e-mail address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it